Girl, interrupted.

 I don't know. That I was sorry. That I will never know what it was like to be her. But I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. You hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside.
I carried on this way for three years.
In summary it was a roller coaster of overdoses, eating disorders, cutting, and an indefinite amount of suicide attempts.
I went somewhere this summer that made me take a step back and see how messed up my life was.
I needed to change. I needed to want to change.
I had to accept that I was officially in a psych ward.
That everything I said and did was recorded.
So I gave myself over to God, and I let him take over control.
No doctors, specialists, or psychologists could help me.
Only He could, and my will to believe in Him.
That was three months ago.
This is me now.